Rusty and the Puppy

Hey-Lo everybody. It's Rusty checking in again. Mama is lazy and won't ever write any posts to the blog, so she says I should. Silly Mama. I'm so tired I don't think I can handle writing a new post that would be entertaining.

Why am I tired? Well, it's all Mama's fault too. She met this new boy on that stupid Internet dating thing. He is very nice and all, and when he came over, I tried to establish that I'm the boss dog but he yelled at me and made me stop! I guess I can be fine with that. The bad thing is that he and Mama took me over to his house so that I didn't have to sit in my kennel for a long time. He has a dog too! I thought that was gonna be fun, but his dog is CRAZY! Briscoe would not leave me alone to explore or sleep or NOTHING! But then I got up on the couch and then Briscoe left me alone. That was good, but I wanted to explore and sniff stuff.

Oh, and there's a cat at that house too. I could smell it and I heard it and I SAW it! That was too much for me to handle. I wanted to go see it up close and be friends, but it ran away from me. Why did it do that? That isn't any fun. Silly kitty.

So, anyway. That's why I'm tired. But I like the new boy. He has the same name as Uncle Matthew, except we call him Matt and not Matthew. It's a little confusing, but they smell different, so I guess I won't get too confused. Besides, Uncle Matthew comes over but only to visit his truck and he doesn't even come inside to say hi to me. What a meany-head.

All right, very tired now. Gotta take a nap.

Love,
Rusty

How was your Halloween?

Okay, so it's kinda blurry, but...

HEEEEEEEEEEEEEERE'S RUSTY! Teehee...

I wore the wings to work, and then I got home and put them on Rusty for a photo opportunity. He didn't particularly enjoy it, but he looked pretty cute. Like a puppy-dragon. Love that.

I didn't have many trick-or-treaters. I'm thinking that next year I'll buy candy but I won't pass it out. It isn't worth waiting for hours to have 4 kids who aren't even wearing costumes come by and expect candy. Nope. I'll eat the candy myself or take it to work.

Hope everyone else had a better time.

Big sigh

Rusty here, dudes. I've totally recovered from my surgery. I have fur on my belly and you can't see my scar anymore. And the last time I went to the vet to check on my pee, I didn't have a bladder infection. But that doesn't always mean anything, as we've learned.

Mama plays tennis ball with me, but she takes the ball away from me! Then she throws it across the room so I have to capture it again! And this morning, she was poking the whorls of fur on my butt that I use as a defense mechanism. They make my butt look like a face with eyes so that people think I have heads on both ends. Like in Dr. Doolittle with the Push-Me-Pullyu.

I'll tell you the secret of how to tell if it's my face or not...

If the end where you are is really stinky, that's my butt.

So now you know the secret. I'm not worried because Mama will protect me from you. Haha.

Oh, I'm sleepy now. I need to take a nap. I will talk to you later.

Love,
Rusty ♥

Hill-Air-Eee-Us

So, last night at church choir practice, my friend Karen and I were sitting in the front row. Usually we sit in the second row (better for goofing off, y'know), but the soprano section had to consolidate, so we moved foward. Someone made the comment about how close we were to Jennifer (our director), so Karen and I decided to see how close we could get. Surreptitiously, we moved our chairs forward just a little bit at a time throughout the whole rehearsal, so by the end we were practically right under Jennifer's stand.

The best part? Jennifer didn't notice until rehearsal was over! Hill-Air-Eee-Us.

Anyway. Last night was the season finale of Project Runway (cry) and Jeffrey won. I know some people were disappointed with that outcome, but I was actually not shocked and kind of happy. I think Jeffrey showed the most innovation in his collection. Laura is too one-dimensional for the fashion world. Uli will be hugely successful designing ready-to-wear stuff, because any woman could wear her garments (oh wow, I'm such a P-Run nerd). Michael needs some more experience designing, and his inexperience showed in his collection, but his sense of style is fabulous and I don't see that he'll have any problem finding a niche.

Anyway, since you all care so much about my opinion on P-Run, now you'll all click on the link to the right and go see the collections at the P-Run website so you can formulate your own opinion. :)

And that's all I can talk about for today. Maybe there'll be more to talk about tomorrow or this weekend.

Ciao~

Cooking for one person

Cooking for one blows big, fat, hairy horse chunks. Yes, I said big, fat AND hairy. I ate better when I was in college than I do now when I'm making more money. What is wrong with this picture?

However, on the up side, I get leftovers from my parents quite a bit. That's better than what I would be eating otherwise. Better than what I was eating in college too. Anyway, enough about food (or I'll have Rusty hanging over my shoulder and drooling on the keyboard).

Can't decide what kind of candy to get the little hellions that come to my door on Halloween. I have got to get something good because I don't want any tricks, as funny as I think it might be to see someone try to TP my house. I don't have any trees, so the only place to hang the paper would be the house. Would it be gross if I collected the paper and saved it? It would save me a lot of money.

So, that's it for tonight. Hope everyone has been having a good week. My bus broke down this morning, if that gives you any sense of how my week has been so far.

Ciao~

Ooooo.... Spooky....

My house is a tennis ball graveyard. I'm not going to say who is responsible, but I'll give you a hint. He has four paws, lots of fur and big brown eyes. Tennis anyone?

Let me tell you something else. My dad and I went to the farm a while ago for the harvest festival and I found a pumpkin that was having an identity crisis. It thought it was popcorn. I picked it so it would feel better. Now I have a pumpkin. Yay for pumpkins. I thought maybe I would carve it as follows:

1. Take pumpkin out to driveway.
2. Smash pumpkin with baseball bat.
3. Draw chalk outline around smashed pumpkin.
4. Put up police caution tape.
5. Put up sign labeling display as "Halloween: Life on the Streets"

However, if I did that, I would not have any pumpkin for making pumpkin soup. I shall have to see.

Nothing else to say.

Have a good week!

Ciao~

Bad Mouse

Mama is makin' fun of me this morning. She was eating her breakfast and I saw a big scary monster! It ran under the refrigerator. So I was all excited and bouncing around and trying to make it come out so I could catch it.

Mama came and asked what I was fussing about and peeked behind the fridge.

"Oh, a mouse!" she said. Then she put out mouse traps and blocked underneath the front of the fridge. Now we're waiting for the monster to fall for the mouse traps. I don't think it will. I have to keep checking on it. And I can smell the peanut butter Mama used in the mouse traps.

But now she's making fun of me, calling me "Vicious Killer" and "Killer". See if I try and save her from the scary monster next time.

Bye.
Rusty.

Yuck

All right. 'Fess up. Who decided that it could rain today? Hmmmmmm? Mama said it wasn't her, so if it was you, you better tell me. Rain sucks. I hate getting wet. Excuse me for a minute so I can lick my paws some more...

That's better. Mama's doing laundry today, so she said I could write a post. I don't really know what to write about except the rain. Wait, I gotta lick myself some more...

Why did Mama ask about me licking my naughty bits? And someone called me creepy for talking about Mama's online dating. I think it's far creepier to talk about naughty bits. Besides, I don't use toilet paper. I gotta clean it off somehow. Who's creepy now? Hang on a sec, gotta itch...

It was cold and rainy today. Who said that was okay? It wasn't Mama and it wasn't Grandpa. Oh, I bet it was Superlative Steve. I bet he got mad about not having to go into work today so he decided he would make it cold and rainy...

What, Mama?

He can't? Really?

Well then, who?

Really?

Oh.

Mama says that no person can decide the weather, not even the cute weather guy on the channel 11 news. They just guess. Whatever. I'm going back to sleep. Next time Mama can post for herself.

Love,
Rusty

Random stuff

If I put Rusty in an automobile that can fly, would that make him a Flying Car Pet?

If I enjoy watching movies that scare the poop out of me, does that make me a masochist?

Why is it that when Rusty licks his naughty bits, he does it as noisily as possible?

Who decided that lawns should be made up of grass, and who decided that we should have to mow it? Are there lawn police who go around making sure that lawns are kept at the proper height? Should I worry if I decide not to mow my lawn?

Why do the people in scary movies always open the door (or some equivalent of that)? Haven't they watched any scary movies? Would you open the door?

Why are they called doughnut holes? Why not doughnut balls? The suggestiveness quotient is the same for both, and doughnut balls is a more accurate description.

I want to go shark fishing. Can you make that happen?

Do you have any random stuff you wanna talk about? Go for it.

Ciao~

Caution! Beware!

Here is my warning to you all: If you have a jar of the Pickles That Nobody Likes in your refrigerator and it's been there for more than a couple weeks, take caution when eating them. I just ate some and I have no idea how long they've been curing and they made my eyes water.

Yeah, that's how good they are. I think I might go eat some more once my eyes stop watering. I wish I knew how long they've been in my fridge. Because before that, who knows how long they were in my parents' fridge. Yeah, they're good. Just a minute...

Woohoo. You want some? Well, too bad. You won't like 'em because they're the Pickles That Nobody Likes. That's why my brother and I get to eat 'em all. I don't know if you could handle them.

Anyway. Enough about pickles. It's Friday. TGIF! And tomorrow is Saturday. Don't have any plans. Isn't that nice? And it's supposed to storm tomorrow. I like storms. Except my lawn needs mowing. Guess it will have to wait yet again. Anybody want to come do that for me?

Hope you all had a good Friday and that tomorrow's even better.

Ciao, loves~

Tragedy

It is a dark day for me. Kayne was kicked off Project Runway tonight. I didn't think he'd get to the final three, but it's still hard for me to deal with the loss.

Anyway, on to happier things. Here's another picture from this weekend. I have the color versions of these pictures, but I prefer the black and white. It makes me look at the subject and the light instead of the color. It changes the way you look at things.

Rusty's sleeping and telling me that I should be going to bed. As are my eyes, since my vision is starting to blur, even with my glasses on.

Didja see that yesterday my post was picked as a blog of the day? Didja? You should go see.

Have a good day tomorrow, y'all!

~Ciao

I want a dark room

I miss being able to develop my own pictures in a dark room. I loved doing that. I liked watching the images appear on the paper and messing around with the process, burning and cropping and all that stuff. I wish I had a dark room. At least I have PSP so I can change my pictures to greyscale, which puts them in black and white. I like black and white better than color a lot more, because it makes you focus more on the light and the subject and not the colors. That's what photography is. It isn't just snapshots with point and shit... er... shoot cameras. I always hate people who find out that I like photography, and then hand me their little point and shoot cameras expecting me to take a fabulous picture. It's all about the frickin' hardware people! You can't get fabulous pictures with a little piece of crap camera! Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

Before I got my new SLR, I was doing a lot of finessing with my little point and shoot digital to get pictures that looked the way I wanted. I had to do a lot of cropping and crap in PSP. Sigh. It was work. Now I'm happy with my digital SLR. Can hardly put the thing down.

Anyway. I had my little rant and now I feel better. Have a lovely, lovely day tomorrow.

~Ciao

Haha, Creepy

Yep, Rusty and I are creepy. That describes us perfectly. We don't want to be referred to as "cutesy" because Rusty is a big boy dog, and ain't no way he's cute. And I was called cute too much by an ex-boyfriend to ever consider it a compliment. Besides, I'm a grown woman and cute is reserved for small children and puppies. So, creepy we shall be. I do have a pet snake.

It's FRIDAY. Yesssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss. Is everyone else happy that it's Friday?

Anyway. That's about all I gotta say. Have a good day.

~Ciao

Something to hold you over the weekend

I need to think about putting a password on this computer so Rusty can't break in and write posts here without me knowing. Not that anything he said was wrong. True, I would like some human companionship (outside of work).

I did make a friend (the person I went to the state fair with), and that's good. It keeps my mother from trying to set me up.

Yeah, so she and her yoga instructor did set me up with a guy that works where Mom takes yoga. We exchanged emails, but... Nada. That was all right. I sometimes wonder if me being a little zany can be off-putting, but then I remember that if someone doesn't like me for who I am, then they don't really like me. So there.

Rusty says that he would have written the post, but he's too busy licking his naughty bits.

In other news, it once again looks like a redneck Nascar fan lives at my house because my brother's truck is parked in my driveway. Maybe that will keep people from knocking on my door at 2am (which actually happened, so I called the non-emergency police number).

In other other news, I was looking through my collection of writings, and I think I might have enough short stories to put into a collection... Which makes me start thinking about polishing and publishing. Finally.

I will see you all later. Rusty will see you all later.

Have a good Labor day weekend!

~Ciao

Nobody expects the Spanish Inquistion

Hello. Rusty here. I'm very excited today, because Mama told me that we're going to the cabin this weekend and I'm going to get to run around in the woods and get ticks all over me and pee on everything in the woods and sniff everything in the woods and maybe I'll find something dead to roll in and carry around and I'll get to ride in the canoe with Mama and Grandpa and try and eat the fish they catch and oh, my goodness I'm so excited!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Whew. That was a lot. My real reason for posting tonight (Mama doesn't know I broke into her computer while her back was turned) was that Mama decided to do that stupid online dating thing. I'm frowning about it.

My Mama needs a nice boy, not a stupid boy, but she won't let me check any of the boys out before she meets them. I have standards they have to meet! They can't make my Mama upset or hurt her feelings or anything, because then her face gets all melty and wet. When her face gets all melty and wet, then she wipes it on me because when she's upset she likes to snuggle me. Now, I don't mind snuggling, but the whole melty-wet thing kinda bugs me.

The nice thing is that Mama doesn't need a boy, because she has me. But I guess she kinda wants a person to hang out with occasionally, which is okay with me. As long as she's not cheating on me with other dogs. How would she feel if I cheated on her with other Mamas? I bet she wouldn't like it. But I wouldn't be able to cheat on her with other Mamas, because they wouldn't smell like my Mama and I love my Mama, so I wouldn't cheat.

Okay. I'm sleepy now, and Mama is coming back to her computer, so I have to go. But now you know how I feel. Just don't tell my Mama.

Love,
Rusty

Why I Like Saturdays by Rusty

I like Saturdays because Mama is home all day long and she lets me play with things like this fun chew toy. And we go for walks and play in the backyard and take naps and fun stuff like that.

Except yesterday. Yesterday, Mama left me alone in my kennel because she went to some dumb state fair thing. I want to know why I can't go to the state fair too!

She came home and she smelled different. She smelled like Grandma and Grandpa and OTHER DOG. That is inappropriate. How would she feel if I cheated on her with other people? Huh? How can she go places and be with other dogs? That's cheating on me and it makes me mad. Just for that, I'm never going to get off the couch. Ever.

What?

Tennis ball?

Oooooo!!!! Yes, yes, yes! I want the tennis ball! Gimmee!!

I gotta go.

Love,
Rusty

Don't touch my stuff

Right now, I am sitting on my couch in my pajamas (sort of) with Monty Python's Flying Circus running in the background. I am eating a root beer float in preparation for the joy of going to the state fair on Saturday (note that I didn't capitalize the words "state" or "fair", that would be the musical).

It is raining outside, and I am hoping that it will stop by the time Rusty needs to go potty. But the good news is that there is clear sky to the west.

At least I'm not going to be sleeping in a tent tonight. When I was camping in July, my brother and I were in the tent. After a couple of wicked rainstorms, we informed our parents (we didn't ask, because it wasn't optional) that we were getting rid of the tent. The tent rode on the back of Matthew's truck straight to the dumpster. That was a lovely day.

Rusty wants to show you his new trick, but he hasn't perfected it yet. So we'll keep it a secret until it's perfect.

Have a lovely evening!

Ciao~

Good thing I mowed the lawn yesterday

Yeah, it rained today. So I feel pretty smart for having mowed yesterday. I can be pretty lazy about mowing sometimes, especially when it's warm outside. But when I'd actually be willing to go outside and mow... The lawn doesn't need it! I gotta figure out a way for Rusty to mow the lawn.

I tried to post a picture, but Blogger wouldn't let me. Gosh darn it! Well then, I'm just going to go have some cookies and cream frozen yogurt and watch Law and Order:Criminal Intent.

I just wanted everyone to know how smart I am for mowing the lawn yesterday BEFORE it rained.

Rusty is all tuckered out from playing tennis ball this afternoon. And tomorrow is Monday. Yay. Back to work. Don't I sound excited?

Ciao~

Camera sale today

My mom and I are going to a tent sale at a big camera retailer this afternoon. I don't have money to buy another camera right now (still paying for Rusty's tests and surgery, y'know), but Mom is going on a canoeing trip in Utah this fall. She has a camera, but not digital. My dad has a digital camera, but Mom isn't sure if she wants to borrow it.

Mowed my lawn this morning. It needed it. I need to be better about mowing than I am. Except before I went on vacation, it was really dry and I didn't absolutely have to mow it. But now we've had some rain.

I created a new profile on the internet dating site, because my friend/co-worker Amy came over on Tuesday to have me take a picture of her for her profile and we were looking at guys and having a good time, except I could only look at like 3 profiles before it asked me to create one of my own. Sigh. I don't care if no one talks to me. It's all about being able to read the profiles. Entertainment, people!

S.S. kept thinking his comments weren't posting. They do eventually post, but I have Comment Moderation activated. I have to approve your comment before it appears. Don't worry though, I approve pretty much all the comments. :)

Have a good weekend!

A fish I caught and a sweater I made

So, I went away for a week and camped/fished/played/etc with my family. I got home a week ago today. And for the past week, I have no excuse for why I haven't posted anything. Make something up for yourself, people! You know how it is when you get back from vacation.

It was a lovely week. Matthew and I fished every day as much as we could. By the end of the week we'd caught so many decent sized fish that I caught a 12-inch largemouth bass and kind of shrugged about it. That is not right! And that is why I am staying home this weekend instead of going to the cabin with my parents. Oh, yes. And I need to mow my lawn.

This morning, I pulled weeds and filled up my garbage can. Those darn weeds just keep getting ahead of me. I need to get an extension cord for the weed whip my dad gave me. Aren't parents great?

Rusty's glad to have me home again. He liked hanging out with his auntie Kristi (my brother's fiancee) and her new dog Foo-Foo (uh... Don't ask), but it isn't the same as Mama.

That's all she wrote for now. Of course, there's always other stuff that I don't write about, but sometimes it's stuff I can't write about. Not yet, at least.

Ciao~